Gun Rights Policy Conference: Emily Miller Hasn’t Done Force-on-Force Training and Has to Go to the Bathroom Real Bad

Every now and then someone asks me why I don’t have a “real job” (hi Mom!). I answer simply “I don’t play well with others.” While that would make me a lousy mainstream media political reporter, it has its advantages in the no-holds-barred blogosphere. I don’t just ask tough questions I hit people over the head with them. For example, when I spotted Emily Miller scooting across the Hyatt’s deeply disturbing carpet I shouted out her name. “Emily Miller!” (in case you forgot). Here’s what I forgot: the Washington Times gun rights reporter has a secret “admirer” who’s threatened her life. No wonder, then, that Emily stopped and winced, as if she’s just heard the report of a long range rifle . . .

What’s that book? How to Lose Friends and Alienate People? Anyway, I quickly introduced myself to the diminutive writer who just as quickly thanked TTAG for its support of her efforts. Indicating that Emily hadn’t really caught some of the more barbed remarks embedded therein. Which is just as well.

I mentioned her death threat and asked if she carried anyway. You know; on the DL. Off-the-record. If Miss Miller had answered affirmatively I wouldn’t be mentioning it now. Obviously. Emily said something about not wanting to go to jail and losing her gun rights. Sensible girl, who may or may not be carrying a can of pepper spray.

I half-jokingly said if she got caught with a gun it would be like Elvis’ death by constipation (true story but I used a less scatalogical analogy): a great career move. “I better not miss,” she said.

Wait. I was talking about Emily getting busted by the cops for carrying. Not Emily shooting a BG. And certainly not not shooting a bad guy. “It’s OK to miss,” I said reassuringly. “As long as the bad guy runs away, that’s a result.” I mean, survival’s more important than street cred, isn’t it?

At that point I asked Emily if she’d had any force-on-force training. “I trained with Rob,” she said, referring to TTAG writer and Kardashian-friendly gun guru Rob Pincus. “You haven’t really trained until you’ve felt a pain penalty,” I said half-jokingly.

I’m not sure if Emily Miller informed me of her urgent need to go to the bathroom at that exact moment. If I’m honest, I’d have to say yes. Yes it was. Anyway, ice broken (in my own special way). I’ll ask Miss Miller about gun rights for felons the next time I see her. That ought to be a safe topic.

comments

  1. avatar KNOWWHATIAMTALKINGABOUT says:

    RF. You are approaching this all wrong. You need to say something like: Why don’t we talk about this topic more over dinner. You know – ask her out. You may even be able to offer protection from the stalker.

    Of course, let her use the bathroom first.

    1. avatar Not Too Eloquent says:

      No, ask her if she would like to have dinner with Not Too Eloquent. I can be in Orlando in a couple of hours!!

  2. avatar Aharon says:

    “You haven’t really trained until you’ve felt a pain penalty,” I said half-jokingly.

    RF, have you been recently reading tales of kinky erotica?

  3. avatar Mark says:

    “Kardashian-friendly gun guru Rob Pincus”
    I heard Rob discussing the negative comments about his efforts to bring a new shooter into the shooting community. His point was that however “we” feel about Kardashians, “they” like ’em and we need to be overtly welcoming of “them” if we ever hope to get Constitutional thinking going mainstream.
    Unfortunately, I have to admit I really don’t want a Kardashian in the next lane at the range since their entourage would take up all the available parking but it’s unlikely those who can afford personal ranges would ever suffer association with commoners anyway.

  4. avatar speedracer5050 says:

    RF has apparently been overwhelmed by the sight of too many bikini clad young women and has gotten sidetracked!!! LoL!!
    Hey RF: Don’t forget to post the links and photos of some of those young bikinis while you are out and about. You gotta keep up the standards you know!!!

  5. avatar John Fritz says:

    Another person on my hero list.

    Heroine I mean.

  6. avatar jwm says:

    Robert, it’s called people skills. Gotta work on those. Let us know if she slaps a restraining order on you.

    1. avatar Aharon says:

      slap slap slap

      1. avatar Not Too Eloquent says:

        No big deal RF. I would be stuttering and stammering and making an a$$ out of myself also in the presence of fantastical beauty. Some girls find that appealing. Who knows?

  7. avatar Ralph says:

    I think it’s obvious that our RF is one silver-tongued devil, n’est pas?

    1. avatar bontai Joe says:

      I think it’s more obvious why Robert is single and lonely. Man I hope your conversation wasn’t actually as bad as you wrote it up.

  8. avatar jkp says:

    It’s not ok to miss.

    You’re morally, legally, and financially responsible for every round you send downrange.

    Don’t forget that.

  9. avatar JJ Swiontek says:

    Cool! Well done Robert! You actually met Emily Miller. Ask her to write something for TTAG.

  10. avatar Skyler says:

    Yes. Yes you are lacking in social skills.

    1. avatar Robert Farago says:

      Now tell me something I don’t know. No wait. Don’t.

      1. avatar jwm says:

        Jeebus, RF, stop while you’re ahead. You’re ahead aren’t you?

  11. avatar Alan Rose says:

    The one (first) question I’d like to ask Ms. Miller is, why she hasn’t moved South out of DC.

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