You’ve heard of the dead walking the earth. Now we have a new situation to deal with: metal tools brazenly committing felonies. In an article titled, Gun robs fast food worker, something called laurinburgexchange.com indulges in a little acute anthropomorphism to describe an armed robbery in the North Carolina town yesterday. “Around 12:30 a.m. on Wednesday, Fredrick Lawrence McPhatter, 21, of 419 East Covington St. approached Joshia Locklear outside of McDonald’s while Locklear was on his break, shooting near his head and causing minor injury to his right eye, said Lt. Marc Godwin of the Laurinburg Police Department.” McPhatter’s jacket then concealed the stolen goods in a pocket as his shoes fled the scene of the crime. Fortunately, a police cruiser located the lawless gun and clothing nearby and took them into custody.