“The main feature of the new Kalashnikov rifle will be one-armed man.” No, the Russian gun’s designers haven’t been smitten by The Fugitive. Nor has Google translate gone sideways on Gary Numan’s One Man Army. isvestia.ru reports that the new Kalashnikov will offer “the ability to perform any act with the mechanics of the machine with one hand. If a fighter is injured or his other hand is busy with something, he can still perform all the operations with a gun – switch fuse, distort the bolt and even change the shop.” That sounds particularly handy for a Russian gangster’s moll. The Izhmash gunsmiths also promise a 60-round mag, loads o’ calibers and improved ergonomics. That said, the new Kalashnikov will weigh the same as the old rifle ’cause “a sharp reduction in weight can be a negative impact on its characteristics, and in particular the accuracy of fire.” Yeah, like that’s an issue. The Special K’s coming to a third world dictatorship near you in 2012. Ish.