A long, skinny brown box arrived today, courtesy of our fearless leader’s connections with Thompson Center. When I opened the package, my curious eyes were greeted with the spectacle of a stainless steel, synthetic-stocked, fiber-optic-sighted flintlock. It was like seeing George Washington wearing his uniform and cocked hat cruising around Philly in a custom Escalade with ground-effect lights and really fly rims. Part of me screamed out, like an Olympic skater who’s just been Gilloolied, “No! Noooooo! Why? Whyyyyyyyyyy?” Another part of me can’t wait to load it up with some Holy Black and patched round ball and find out how she shoots. Bonus! The Fire Storm flinter arrived right in the middle of muzzleloader deer season here in The Natural State. So who knows what I might do with this tacticool flinklock? Or what I might do to it: ACOG? Laser? Keep refreshing TTAG to find out.