Wilson Combat’s Love Letter to FPSRussia

Wilson Combat ammo comes in a way cool Tupperware-style container with a warning message printed on a hand-cut piece of paper. I reckon it’s a prose poem: a love letter to our favorite faux Russian, for who common sense is not so common. “WARNING: To avoid serious injury or death the shooter and/or bystanders. Use only in firearms in good condition with markings exactly matching the ammunition. Always check the barrel and remove obstructions and/or excess lubricant before firing, or if a light recoil or off sound occurs. If firearm fails to fire point muzzle in a safe direction and avoid exposure to breech while carefully unloading. Always use shooting glasses and hearing protection . . .

Keep firearm pointed in a safe direction at all times. To prevent ricochet, do not shoot at hard surfaces or water. Always keep ammunition dry and store in a cool, dry place. Discharging firearms in poorly ventilated areas, cleaning firearms, or handling ammunition may result in exposure to lead and other substances known to cause birth defects, reproductive harm and other serious physical injury. Have adequate ventilation at all times. Wash hands thoroughly after exposure.

Did they forget anything?

comments

  1. avatar Todd Price says:

    Sounds like they did this to ensure compliance with the Republic of California, to have 1 label for all ammunition shipments.

  2. avatar Ralph says:

    I think they left out the novena.

    1. avatar DonWorsham says:

      Praise the Lord and pass the bullets.

      1. avatar HSR47 says:

        Praise the Lord, and pass the ammunition.

  3. avatar Gregg says:

    When properly used may prevent rape, assault and murder. Side effects include feeling more secured and being self-reliant.

    1. avatar taurus609 says:

      Excellent!!!

  4. avatar JOE MATAFOME says:

    I think Greggs love letter gets the point across much better.

  5. avatar HAVEGUN says:

    Reminds me of my first Kimber.

    To paraphrase

    “even used as intended, may cause serious injury or death”

    Duh

    That was in like 1997.

  6. avatar Aharon says:

    Warning:
    Wear adequate hearing protection when using product. Firing ammunition without adequate hearing protection may result in loss of hearing and other health issues. You are responsible for ensuring that the firearm barrel is free of blockages and materials that might cause the bullet to impact with exploding the barrel resulting in you or your family and friends becoming maimed or killed. We still expect you not to refute your purchase since sales are final and to pay your credit card bill.

  7. avatar Ordine Nuovo says:

    Reminds me of a quote from Blue Velvet’s villain, Frank Booth:

    “Don’t be a good neighbor to her. I’ll send you a love letter, straight from my heart, fucker! You know what a love letter is? It’s a bullet from a fucking gun, fucker! “

  8. avatar Jeff says:

    Your obsession with FPS Russia is getting just a bit creepy. FYI.

  9. avatar Chris Dumm says:

    Just reminding me of Frank Booth will probably give me nightmares. I hope Wilson doesn’t start engraving the whole owners’ manual on the side of the barrel (or cartridge case) like Ruger does.

  10. avatar Magoo says:

    Thanks, personal injury lawyers!

    My favorite warning label was on a shovel I purchased recently: Don’t strike yourself or others over the head with it, don’t try to put the big end in your mouth, etc.

  11. avatar Dirk Diggler says:

    Don’t blame personal injury lawyers. Blame the morons who get on juries and award the money in the first place. I had a case in front of a jury once for a car accident. We admitted liability for the accident but denied there were damages. fortunately (and as a total shocker) the jury found my client (I was an inhouse lawyer at an auto company) liable, but awarded ZERO in damages. The look of shock on the plaintiff’s lawyers face was priceless when I went over, shook his hand and said “congrats – you won.”

    Again though, much of the stupidity for warnings comes from average folk who dole out damages like candy at halloween. When that crap stops, the plaintiffs bar will wither and die.

  12. avatar Jericho941 says:

    FPSRussia hey everyone, how’s it going today? FPSRussia. I’d like to talk to you about something vaguely related FPSRussia to gun safety FPSRussia. No, I don’t have a creepy FPSRussia obsession and we are NOT whoring for traffic. FPSRussia. But I think the internet FPSRussia needs to know that I think FPSRussia is an irresponsible FPSRussia gun owner, so I am going to remind you of it by referencing FPSRussia in everything I can even slightly relate to FPSRussia. FPSRussia. Here, I’ll FPSRussia prove it by not using his Google bait name FPSRussia and start saying Faux Russian and Synthetic Soviet in the posts that I’ve already titled with FPSRussia. YOU HAVE AN OBLIGATION TO WEAR PROTECTION FPS KYLE THE FAKE RUSSIAN.

    Now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s talk about coffee.

    FPSRussia.

  13. avatar Scott says:

    Don’t be BEECH!!!!!

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