Strict gun control? Check. Dirt bike ban? Working on it. Hmmm…what to do next to become that violence-free nirvana everyone dreams of? A couple of Boston city councilors, Michael Ross and Tito Jackson, have hit upon just the thing. Knife control. Beantown’s thinkers of great thoughts and prognosticators of great prognostications know just what to do about knife crime – regulate the pointy little buggers. It’s worked well in the UK, right? “This is just something that’s not regulated,” as Councillor Ross noticed to his horror. Shall we help them with some logical next steps? Hardware stores selling lead pipes. Sporting goods stores pushing baseball bats. They’re not regulated either. Two more “public safety loopholes” that must be addressed. Good thing they haven’t restricted tar and feathers. Yet.

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18 Responses to Nothing’s Too Insignificant To Regulate In A Machine City

  1. what if i make a pointed stick??? are you going to ban trees next??? howabout banning all the kitchen knifes you have access to when you go to bed , bath and beyond…better yet make them all out of plastic…..

  2. They are going to need to create Skynet to prevent all of us filthy humans from hurting each other. Our robot overlords will know what is best for us decaying meatbags.

  3. On the bright side, we already know Farago’s next website will be thetruthaboutknives.com. Time to domain squat.

  4. Legislators pass laws. That’s what they do. That’s all they do. Once they stop passing laws, we have no further use for them. We cannot feign surprise when they run out of productive things to do and become little tin gods like these two jackasses. Lord Acton knew it would happen. Thomas Jefferson knew it would happen. Madison knew it too.

    Barry Goldwater once said that his most important job as a Senator wasn’t passing new laws, it was repealing old ones. He was right. That’s what libertarians understand, but republicans and democrats can’t, and won’t.

  5. Why is it that so many nationally significant cities, places where the country was born, have become hotbeds of all that’s wrong and anti-American?

  6. You guys are reactionary nuts!

    I am more than happy to comply with weapons regulations. I happily stood in line to register my son’s Louisville Slugger. We had to use a Boy Scout wood burner to put a serial number on it because the manufacturer was negligent. I cannot believe that in this day and time the US government is allowing baseball bat manufacturers to produce millions of weapons with not even a small thought to accountability.

    I do have a question for the general audience. I inspect construction sites. Every day I am confronted with boards that have nails or screws protruding. The workers claim that they did not intend to create weapons. Their excuse is generally that the boards were used for bracing. Do I call local law enforcement of the BATFKBBE (Bureau of Alchohol, Tobacco, Firearms, Knives, Bats, and Boards Enforcement)?

    • Nope. Just call your local Congressman and tell him or her that there ought to be a law. Believe me, s/he will thank you for it.

  7. A quote from T.S. Eliot’s ‘Choruses from the Rock’. Note especially, (in this case) the last sentence.

    Why should men love the Church? Why should they love her laws? She tells them of Life and Death, and of all they would forget. She is tender where they would be hard, and hard where they like to be soft. She tells them of Evil and Sin, and other unpleasant facts. They constantly try to escape from the darkness outside and within By dreaming of systems so perfect that no one will need to be good.”

    The Liberal Paradise, frothy with perfect laws, run by perfect men, so no one need to be good.

  8. Called the MA police and informed them that my 86 year old Mom had numerous pointy knitting needles that can be purchased with no ID, age restrictions or license after reading this article.
    I also requested that they search her house and confiscate or dull any sharp or pointy things
    If she had taken better care of her teeth she wouldn’t need anything sharp
    I’ve done my part, how about you ?

    • It’s already illegal to carry in Massachusetts. The two meatheads above obviously have never read their own state’s laws. What a pair of dumbshits.

  9. I’ve never understood the no locking knife laws. Why can’t my knife lock to keep the blade from swinging in on me when i’m working with it. Knifes I would say are even more day to day tools than firearms. But I love them both.

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