We don’t look for weird news from Milwaukee. Honest we don’t. It just seems to…sort of emanate from there. Is it all the cheese? The beer? The bratwurst? Well you could say that a sausage is involved in this tale of woe. Sort of…
The MPD found Otis Lockett with gunshot holes through his pants. And his penis. When questioned, Lockett claimed someone shot him from behind. That was his story and he was stickin’ to it.
Unfortunately, the trajectory of the bullet didn’t match Lockett’s account. At least according to the ER doc. Which meant two things for Otis. First, he likely shot himself accidentally. Because who would shoot their own penis intentionally, right?
Second, it meant that he had bigger problems than how to comfortably urinate for the next few weeks. Lockett, being a convicted felon, wasn’t supposed to have a gun. But to prosecute him, the DA needed proof. Of the injury. As in pictures.
When Lockett wouldn’t admit to nearly shooting off his own penis, [Detective Gena] Malanche went to Assistant District Attorney Stephan Nolten, who went to Court Commissioner Barry Phillips who on Wednesday authorized the photographs. In her affidavit, Malanche said she would instruct jail medical personnel to safely remove and reapply any bandages around Lockett’s patched-up privates.
Exactly how Lockett managed to Burress himself isn’t known. But in the end, the cops got their pics for proof of the perp’s pistol-perforated penis. Sorry. I couldn’t resist.