Truth be told, I’ve been shooting my yuletide FN SCAR [left] for about four weeks now. As I told Sam, if I didn’t pre-zero my modern home defense sporting assault anti-zombie rifle before the day celebrating the birth of the Christ child, Boxing Day ballistics would’ve bound to have been boring. Unfortunately, a major snow dump looks set to delay the Belgian gun’s official inauguration. Even so, I reckon it’s the best Christmas present since a certain Batman utility belt. Come to think of it, the SCAR serves roughly the same purpose. I know that statement provides ammunition to those who claim gunloons—an epithet to which I’ve taken a real shine—are hormone-crazed boys who never grew up. Yes, but—if you lose your child-like (not childish) enthusiasm for firearms, you might as well buy a can of pepper spray and vote Democratic. So . . . whatdja get?